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March 1, 2020

(EXPOSED) Walmart dairy isles made more cold than needed

Potato Chips doesn't need to be -30 degrees. So why are the stores so freezing?

walmartcold01.jpeg

The beginning

A while ago I mentioned that Walmart had unnecessary cold isles and that I did not know why. I had speculated a couple things ehich have now been disproven. Thanks to an anonymous whistle-blower who is currently on death row due to this discovery we were able to find the truth.

Reasoning

The reason the dairy isle is so cold is actually very simple. The stores are purposely made 15 degrees colder than places like Target and Kroger to stop public sex. The cold temperature decreases testosterone levels in the blood. This is in an attempt to decrease the number of complaints due to patrons having sex in the store.

Thoughts

This doesn't sound like it will work but I think there are actually two small problems with Walmarts plan. One is that the money it takes to run the AC that high is not worth it. Who cares about a little public fuckin. Walmart is trying to suck away all the fun of shopping there. Number two is the cold will make people leave the stores and not cum back. Maybe Walmart has this in the bag but the company hasn't been on the ball lately. The temperature change may rub customers the wrong way. It's not crazy to assume things may get sticky when customers riot. Some people are going to be salty. I guess they'll just have to swallow their pride. The stores must have thought long and hard about this, and if it means making the place more protected, I'm all in.


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